Even though I'd like to think that I'm doing relatively well, I have never been able to get away from my impulsive thoughts and actions. I have been able to tamp down the intensity of the impulses, but have never been able to get away from them fully.
I have so many feelings from the situation in the fall that remain unspoken. I am finding it harder and harder to walk away from a situation which has the potential to allow me to let those feelings out. I am also finding I have more impulses to try to pull someone into some sort of confrontation so that I can finally release.
I am finally on speaking terms with that guy and now all I see myself doing is setting myself up for a break down between us if I finally get out the feelings I have raging inside my brain.
This isn't the only type of situation I find myself in which I can't keep my impulses in check.
I need to find another way in which to let my pent up emotions go in a safe and productive manner, instead of letting them bounce around my brain until they cause breakdowns in my relationships.
UPDATE: Completely cut ties. Never have any intention of contacting him or responding to any attempts at contact again.
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